


of old photos and facebook posts

by guanlins (deliveryservice)



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Canon Compliant, M/M, Pining, for the most part anyway, i don't know if this is angsty or fluffy, wanted this to be pure fluff because we all need it but some parts of it ended up being depressing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-28
Updated: 2017-06-28
Packaged: 2018-11-20 01:06:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11325483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deliveryservice/pseuds/guanlins
Summary: hyungseob finds out about woojin's dark past.





	of old photos and facebook posts

**Author's Note:**

> sorry for the lapslock but my caps lock key is being really annoying and i can barely use it, i'll fix it when i have the time! also this wasn't proofread and english isn't my first language so i apologize for the mistakes!

the day before the practice for the top 35 concert, hyungseob’s phone’s notifications are blown up by a stream of texts from lee euiwoong. this comes off as ridiculous because first of all, the both of them live in the same dorm and therefore texts shouldn’t even be a _thing_ , and two, the last time they’d spoken was right after yuehua practice which was, at the most, only five hours ago.

for all of his general positivity, hyungseob can’t help himself but wonder, _did someone die or something?_

> **FROM:** woongie
> 
> LOOK AT THE 101 GC
> 
> SERIOUSLY              
> 
> YOU HAVE TO SEE
> 
> NOW
> 
> AHN HYUNGSEOB
> 
> HYUNGSEOB
> 
> HYUNG
> 
> SEOB
> 
> WOOJIN’S LOVER BOY

the last nickname raises a brow, but moreover, hyungseob just thinks of how it’s amazing how those texts were all sent within the span of one minute, and the rest of the texts euiwoong sent are gibberish or kaomojis meant to experience rage—or something along those lines. hyungseob doesn’t completely understand the going-ons in euiwoong’s head.

> **FROM:** woongie
> 
> okay i guess you’re asleep now
> 
> (weak)
> 
> go check it tomorrow
> 
> when you wake up

the texts end there, and hyungseob blinks in wonderment, because really, what could be so important that the usually composed lee euiwoong would lose his shit and spam hyungseob with messages?

nevertheless, he complies to the younger’s request, clicking on the kakaotalk group created for all of the 101 trainees. he barely blinks at the 999+ notifications stamp that’s just idly there, because if you make a group chat filled with many people, it’s impossible for it _not_ to be loud. hyungseob himself is a constant presence in the group, though the rest of the yuehua boys only pop online occasionally; seunghyuk’s activity in the group is almost non-existent though, and justin’s only there to laugh whenever one of the trainees experience misery.

almost immediately, his eyes go dizzy with the amount of laughter and gibberish that’s being exchanged in the group, and it takes some time for him to scroll up in order to see whatever it is they were raving about. when he _does_ find it though, at first, it confuses him because it’s only a link; seems innocent enough, and considering it was sent by park jihoon, it might’ve only been some funny pann post because that’s kind of what jihoon usually does. the ones who usually ‘serve tea’ in the group chat are jisung (who also takes the role of the mother hen terrifyingly well), justin, as well as some other trainees whose names aren’t park jihoon. still, it must’ve been good, so hyungseob clicks it anyway.

the page only takes a second or two to load thanks to the brilliant connection supplied in the dorms, though when all of the pictures in the post load, hyungseob loses his sense of words—nothing comes out of his mouth except for incoherent blabber and his head goes blank—because whatever it was that he expected, the truth is nothing like he’d imagined it to be.

instead of a funny anecdote or even a comic strip, the pann post is about _woojin_ , and his eyes can’t believe what he’s seeing.

 **PARK WOOJIN’S DARK PAST** , the title of the post (all caps and everything) echoes within his mind, and as hyungseob scrolls further and further, laughter dissolves from him in rumbles, shoulders shaking with mirth. it’s not just the _pictures_ , which are bad enough as they are (he’s going to have to ask for an explanation for some of those later), but woojin’s old facebook posts are embarrassing as well.

who admits that they’ve lost their underwear on _facebook_? woojin does, apparently, and there must be something terribly wrong with hyungseob because he’s only seeing this as endearing instead of embarrassing. to think that his one pick, the same person who’d gone viral and created a buzz because of ‘sexy baby oh my lady’ and had further cemented his popularity due to his stage charisma, has a past that makes him worthy of the position as the nation’s dark past (some fans are actually calling him that in the post, this hyungseob notes with a snort)—all of this is just such a reversal from the image that woojin usually shows and if that’s not refreshing, then hyungseob doesn’t know what is.

(if the other yuehua boys had done it, hyungseob wouldn’t have found it as endearing as it is when woojin’s the one who’s past is exposed to the general public. but then again, he doesn’t view them the same way he does woojin, the same person hyungseob looks at with stars in his eyes and the same person hyungseob even mentioned in his speech.)

the pann post is longer than hyungseob had expected, and the longer he spends on the page, the more pictures of woojin he sees. the more pictures he sees, the more he feels less chipper and more somber, the ache of missing woojin reemerging once again after hyungseob thought he’d gotten over it just a few days ago. his smile drops, and his lips lilt into a small pout, clear eyes going clouded with a hint of a bittersweet kind of feeling.

hyungseob knows woojin is doing well, of course. he’s keeping up with wanna one’s activities the best he can (completely disregarding euiwoong’s warning _not_ to, because if there’s something worse than pining after someone who probably barely remembers you by now, it’s wondering about what-ifs, what could’ve been because hyungseob was so close to making it). he’s seen their innisfree campaign, the one where woojin shows his snaggletoothed smile, and he’s shining so brightly; woojin, now, is like a radiant sun and as time goes on, hyungseob feels himself drifting away like a cloud, slowly but surely being forgotten.

it’s a sad thought, but sometime, hyungseob can’t control the more realistic side of him, no matter how much he wants to cover up everything with a grin and the words ‘it’s okay, i’m fine! see, i’m smiling?’

_i’m smiling, so why am i still sad?_

 

* * *

 

by the time hyungseob and euiwoong arrive at the site for the boys’ 35 boys concert practice, a majority of the other trainees have arrived already, and the atmosphere is heavy.

sure, they’re being reunited, but this also serves as a painful reminder for the ones who almost made it; the ones who were so close to making it, so close to being a part of wanna one, so close to reaching their dreams—but evidently, didn’t make it.

he can’t even begin to imagine how the 12th place must feel. silently, he makes it a mission for him to approach sewoon later, maybe talk to the older to distract him from whatever kind of emotion that the vocalist could be experiencing.

“is wanna one here already?” hyungseob murmurs in low tones, head tilting slightly to view euiwoong at an easier angle.

“not yet. they’re on their way from a cf filming, i think,” euiwoong recalls, having talked to jihoon just earlier when the both of them were still in the car. hyungseob nods, says his assent, and afterwards the both of them approach their friends—some they saw recently, some not. for hyungseob, it’s weird, because barely two weeks ago, he’d been standing with some of them with the uncertainty of an impending debut. now, they’re the ones who lost, the ones who were good enough to make it that far, but not good enough to debut with the project group.

geonhee greets the yuehua boys with a welcoming grin; hyungseob returns it with a bright one of his own, and euiwoong does too, though to a slightly lesser degree. geonhee and hyungseob are old friends, having known each other well before the show, though for some reason, mnet never chose to give any airtime for their friendship. (“they just don’t want me to make it,” hyungseob remembers geonhee lamenting this to him one day, and while at the time hyungseob had waved it off as an unneeded concern, now, hyungseob’s not so sure. mnet, he now knows, is not above playing dirty.)

“if it isn’t the yuehua sprouts!” the rbw trainee hollers at them, gaining both hyungseob and euiwoong a round of soft chuckles from the others. hyungseob blushes slightly from the attention, though he grins nevertheless, because at least the mood has lifted, even if it’s a very slight boost. “yah, ahn hyungseob, have you seen the kakao group?”

next to him, euiwoong looks as if he wants to laugh, but is barely able to restrain his expression from forming one that makes it obvious. the only way hyungseob knows this is because he’s spent too much time with euiwoong and by now, he’s already memorized the younger’s expressions, ingrained them in his brain, even.

“i have, yeah,” admits hyungseob, an earnest smile written plainly on his lips. “it was a little… shocking?”

the talented vocalist huffs. “shocking’s an understatement.”

hyungseob cracks a minuscule grin. “i guess it is.”

 

* * *

 

wanna one makes it right on time for the practice, because just as the clock shows that it’s the time for practice to start, eleven boys burst inside the room, each of them bowing profusely, a heavy stream of apologies coming out from each of their mouths. hyungseob searches for a familiar mop of red hair amongst the crowd, and finds woojin in between daehwi and jinyoung, wearing a loose training shirt that reminds hyungseob of the days that have long passed.

“we’re sorry we’re late!”

“just in time, actually,” one of the trainees shout, and the words seem to melt the anxiety on wanna one’s faces, each of their expressions morphing into something calmer now that they know they didn’t make the practice start late.

hyungseob, who hasn’t stopped looking at woojin, forgets to breathe for the briefest of moments when woojin’s eyes finally meet his for what feels like the first time in months. the corners of woojin’s lips quirk into a small smile, and hyungseob returns it with a bright beam, ignoring the fact that his ears _must_ be looking as red as a ripe tomato right now. euiwoong, if he notices, might never let him live it down.

 _i miss you,_ hyungseob tries to channel those feelings with his eyes, because making good expressions have always been his strong point, right?

woojin seems to halt his smile for a moment, a touch of confusion showing through the brown pool of his eyes. hyungseob doesn’t know what to make of it, but when all of that confusion disappears, instead being replaced with a burst of clarity—as if park woojin can read the turmoil going on behind hyungseob’s mind like an open book—and (this hyungseob hopes isn’t a figment of imagine), woojin’s eyes grow more solemn as if it’s his own way of saying _i miss you too._

 

* * *

 

it’s difficult for the both of them to get some time to speak alone, because hyungseob’s constantly being dragged around by euiwoong (he swears that euiwoong’s doing this on purpose just to tick him off at this point) while woojin, being a member of wanna one, is constantly being searched for by their staffs; apparently wanna one is set to prepare their special stage, and though hyungseob feels a (very slight) amount of bitterness, he knows they deserve it. they’re the winners, and produce 101, even though it’s already ended, has always been about competition.

winners are winners, losers are losers. he’ll get over it.

break time comes eventually, and all of the trainees rush out of the practice rooms, each of their bodies slick with sweat and loose strands of hair clinging onto their foreheads. they all smell, but this is sight is a familiar one back in the produce 101 dormitories, and through the whole routine, hyungseob feels an odd sense of déjà vu.

they’re free to sit with whoever they want and the cafeteria supplies them with food of higher quality than when the show was ongoing. hyungseob wonders if this is mnet’s way of saying ‘we’re sorry for all the hell we put you through on the show, we’re also sorry for using you guys for our concert but at least now you guys are treated better, right?’, but whatever it is, he’s grateful, and he digs into the food on his plate with gusto.

when he feels the desk shift slightly, he looks up from his plate, a string of spaghetti wrapped around his lips. a cough is sounded, and when hyungseob looks to his right, he sees woojin, plate in hand with an expectant stare pinned onto the yuehua trainee.

“can i sit here?”

hyungseob nods. “sure.” he pulls his tray slightly to the left, giving some more space for woojin’s food. woojin grunts out his thanks, and hyungseob dutifully ignores euiwoong’s mumble of something that sounds suspiciously like ‘caveman.’

instead of chatting hyungseob up for a long overdue conversation, woojin simply consumes his food, munching away and eating with a moderate pace. a content countenance is what greets hyungseob as he observes woojin from the corner of his eyes, and hyungseob isn’t sure how he’s supposed to feel about this. on one hand, there isn’t much awkwardness between them, yet, he feels disappointed that woojin isn’t doing something else like actually conversing instead of sitting next to hyungseob and only eating.

“is there something on my face?” woojin says suddenly, pausing and straying his attention from his food, shifting it onto hyungseob. caught staring, hyungseob’s cheeks turn a dark shade of red, and his throat goes dry as his mind goes full-on frenzy mode. _ahn hyungseob, you idiot!_ he scolds himself in his mind, not doing a good job trying to seem calm. a nervous, jittery smile he’s forcing himself to wear, obvious to the odd look woojin is now throwing him. oh god, woojin’s probably wondering why he’s such a weirdo.

“it’s nothing, woojinie!” hyungseob chirps. or at least, he attempts to chirp. maybe he sounds more like a strangled cat, if euiwoong’s giggles are something to go by.

woojin looks unconvinced, raising a brow with a frown curling his lips. “if you say so.” he’s never been one to force out conversations, and for once, hyungseob is half-glad for it.

not bothering to spare hyungseob more words, woojin returns to his food, picking on it and eating whatever’s left on it. they only have five minutes left before they go back to practice.

hyungseob tries not to stare anymore.

 

* * *

 

him and woojin walk together to the ‘get ugly’ practice room after the disastrous lunch break, woojin patting his (now full) stomach with satisfaction, hyungseob awkwardly fumbling with the loose edges of his shirt next to him. he wants to say something— _anything,_ really—but hyungseob isn’t sure if woojin would appreciate it. maybe he’d been hallucinating earlier, because there’s no way woojin misses him too, right?

really. his feelings are so one-sided yet hyungseob’s still pining for near non-existent straws to grasp on, no wonder euiwoong is done with him.

“how have you been, hyungseob?” upon hearing the words come out of woojin’s mouth, hyungseob nearly trips, because clearly, he didn’t expect woojin to be the one to break the silence. hyungseob plays off the trip as something he’d meant to do (gaining a playful eye roll from woojin who _knows_ that near trip was not intentional at all), and puts on the brightest smile he can muster.

“i’ve been good, woojinie! practicing with the other yuehua trainees—we’re going to debut pretty soon! we might even meet each other in music shows,” offers hyungseob suggestively, not missing the wistful look that overtakes woojin’s eyes, even for just a moment.

“that’d be nice,” admits woojin, voice uncharacteristically soft that if hyungseob hadn’t been paying attention, he wouldn’t have heard it at all.

woojin doesn’t say anything after that, but hyungseob doesn’t want this conversation to die that easily, because who knows if this might be their last one in a long while? maybe hyungseob is selfish for wanting to draw this out, for wanting to spend some more time with woojin when he can, for wanting _woojin._ maybe he’s a terrible person, for all he knows, but this is one of the rare occasions when hyungseob’s not sure if he even cares.

“i’ve been keeping up with your activities,” hyungseob confesses, drawing his gaze to the ground. from the corner of his vision, he sees that woojin straightens after hearing that admittance, and hyungseob smiles a little too himself—woojin is too cute sometimes. “you seem like you’re doing well. i’m glad.”

if hyungseob had been staring at woojin, gauging for his reaction, he wouldn’t have missed the stain of pink that dusts over woojin’s cheeks.

“i’m still getting used to it.” hyungseob can hear nothing but raw honesty in woojin’s words, and he can only imagine how tough it must be on woojin, to suddenly adjust to the life of a celebrity from one of a mere trainee’s. “sometimes i don’t even know what i’m doing.”

woojin isn’t the type to openly expose his vulnerabilities. maybe hyungseob’s only known him for the span of four months, but he knows _that_ much. right now, though, woojin is laying himself bare, openly telling hyungseob that he’s still unsure. even if woojin hadn’t admitted it, hyungseob already had a feeling that woojin still has his insecurities, but to speculate and to know are two entirely different things.

“have some more faith in yourself, woojinie.” the smile that hyungseob directs to woojin is unlike the others; it isn’t sunny, or even strained. it’s soft, the corners of his mouth barely twitching upwards, but it’s real, and hyungseob’s eyes showcase his concern, his affection, his trust in woojin’s abilities, and his love—maybe all at once.

woojin stops in his tracks. hyungseob halts himself too, not wanting— _never_ wanting—to leave the other behind. “thank you,” woojin breathes out, and when he smiles, all hyungseob can think about is how he practically looks the same as his childhood pictures, with the same snaggletoothed smile that never fails to take hyungseob’s breath away.

 

* * *

 

 the ‘get ugly’ team doesn’t practice for too long. all of them are skilled, and within a few repeats, they’ve all remastered their own parts, even managing to add on some new moves to guarantee added flair. they use the remainder of their time to mingle, though hyungseob doesn’t really see the point of it when almost all of the team members made it into wanna one. seongwoo, daniel, jihoon, and woojin—the four of them debuted, only leaving him and samuel as the undebuted ones in their team. samuel though, and this hyungseob knows, has already recorded at least ten songs for his debut album. the kid’s raved about how awesome his songs are to the team for what feels like an eternity, but his eyes are dazzling with so much excitement and happiness that none of them dare to cut him off.

“—and yeah, that’s all i’ve been up to!” samuel wraps up, finally, and the others give him a round of congratulations. hyungseob gives him a thumbs up, which is delightfully returned by the younger. “how about you guys? wait, no. not wanna one, i already know what you’re up to. how about you, hyungseob hyung?”

slightly taken aback at the sudden attention directed towards him, hyungseob smiles awkwardly, because he isn’t really sure what to say aside from debut preparations. the yuehua boys haven’t recorded their songs, hell, they don’t even know what song they’re going to get for their debut. at the moment, all they’re doing is practicing and giving their fans enough content to ensure they won’t be forgotten. attention is, after all, a fickle thing—especially in this industry.

“just practice, but i’m going to debut pretty soon, too!” hyungseob enthuses, and inadvertently catches woojin’s eyes (who’s sitting right across him). almost immediately, hyungseob looks away, because he does _not_ need to blush right now. the others won’t let him live it down, he’s sure of it. “anyways,” he manages to say the words before his ears turn red enough for anyone to notice, and for this, he mentally rewards himself a cookie. “did you all see the kakao group last night? except you, of course, jihoon.”

jihoon, the culprit behind the mess, cackles. uncharacteristic of him, but then again, hyungseob can’t consider himself as close enough to judge what’s in or out of character of him. “you saw that, seob?”

hyungseob grins. “i did! i was pretty shocked when i saw, actually.”

the others seem to catch on, each of them snickering or commenting something about the pictures. seongwoo’s comment, in particular, is scathing: “my past pictures are practically _heaven_ compared to those.”

woojin doesn’t speak much throughout the ordeal, only turning pouty and grunting to show his dissatisfaction. “i didn’t know my friends were going to upload those pictures on the internet.” woojin grimaces, and for a moment, daniel looks like he’s going to say something to cheer him up, but instead he laughs, his whole face crinkling as he does.

“but asking on facebook for your underwear? really?” ong teases him, a ferocious smirk latched onto his lips. at this, woojin hides his face into his arms, looking like he wants to bury a hole and hide there for the remainder of the allotted practice time.

“i was young,” woojin says weakly in his defense, and the others laugh even harder, the room echoing with them. “besides, i’m sure i’m not the only one who has dark past pictures! hyungseob, you have them too, right?”

somehow, the others shut up after hearing that, and seongwoo’s stare turns from curious to almost predatory. hyungseob almost wants to get mad at woojin, but only almost, because he’s _that_ whipped and hopeless. “really now? hey, muel-ah, lend me your phone.” samuel complies, giving his phone to seongwoo’s waiting hands. the wanna one boys have their phones confiscated, which is also the main reason why hyungseob has been unable to contact woojin ever since the show ended.

for the most part, hyungseob’s not that worried, because he regularly searches his name online and so far, all of his ‘past pictures’ are the good ones. the _cute_ ones, even, and it’s exactly for that reason he’s always so grateful for his old friends who only share the kind of pictures that doesn’t give him a title like the ‘nation’s dark past.’

seongwoo evidently doesn’t find any good ones, because his face turns from excited to completely crestfallen as more and more time passes and, the more his fingers tap, the more hyungseob pictures he finds, but none of them the kind of embarrassing content the model slash actor slash idol’s looking for. eventually, seongwoo gives up, instead passing the phone to woojin ceremoniously.

“i can’t believe he hasn’t got any bad past pictures,” seongwoo wails. “he’s like _me._ but i’m stronger.”

daniel snorts at seongwoo’s words, mumbling something that sounds like, “you’re ridiculous.”

woojin finds something though, because there’s suddenly a cheshire grin on his lips, and he presents a picture of hyungseob posing with angel wings in the background for the rest to see. hyungseob… doesn’t really see how that’s a bad picture, but he’s willing to humor woojin, at least.

“what’s so bad about that?” hyungseob asks, feinting offense.

woojin rolls his eyes. “i also have a picture taken with the same background.”

at that, hyungseob gapes. “what, seriously?” he must’ve missed that picture when he was scrolling through the article, but then again, if that’s true, then that’s likely to be the only noteworthy thing woojin would find about hyungseob’s past pictures.

“do i look like i’m kidding?” woojin retorts, sounding Dead Serious™ with his words. “this is unfair, though. why do _i_ look terrible in my past pictures but you look exactly the same?”

“define ‘exactly the same’,” samuel interrupts their conversation at some point, a spark of mischief poorly concealed in his eyes.

hyungseob’s not sure where this is going, nor is he sure if he likes it.

“well, doesn’t he still look cute?” woojin answers, straightforward and almost oblivious to the implications the words have. whoops and loud cheers ring around the room though—except from hyungseob, because hyungseob is gaping at the admittance, unable to fight off the blush that goes from his cheeks down to his neck—and that’s exactly when woojin realizes that he just admitted he thinks hyungseob is _cute._ it’d be a different story if it were someone like seonho or lee woojin, who are the maknaes of the show and everyone would collectively agree are cute, but this is hyungseob, the same hyungseob that his label mate euiwoong gives the stink-eye to sometimes.

it’s _ahn hyungseob_ , and park woojin just called him _cute._

hyungseob carefully watches woojin’s reaction (trying his best to control the flush that’s making him feel uncomfortably warm even though the room’s air conditioner is turned on full force), catching the way his eyes widen in realization that slowly sinks into admittance, never missing the way woojin attempts to hide his blush by ducking his head, eyes practically glaring holes at the ground.

“w-what?” hyungseob croaks out, too stunned to properly construct coherent sentences.

“you’re…” woojin looks as if he’s fighting himself whether to say it or not, but in the end, he mumbles, “cute.”

at this point, samuel’s ‘oh my god!’ is getting too loud, and the rest of the group’s loud cheering isn’t really helping hyungseob hear woojin properly at _all._ hyungseob’s pretty sure he heard woojin call him ‘cute’ though (for the second time) and he kind of wants to melt into a puddle.

“no returns,” woojin suddenly says loudly, drawing collective looks of confusion from everyone in the room.

“what do you mean by no returns?” hyungseob asks, brows knitted together and fingers tracing patterns on the floor, attempting to control his nerves. he’s an _idol in training,_ he should know how to manage his nerves better. (but this is woojin—and isn’t woojin an exception?)

a sudden burst of confidence seems to have inspired woojin, because he seems to straighten, and his next words are spoken clearly with a definite gaze, even if his cheeks are still prominently red. “you’re cute. and i’m not taking it back.”

**Author's Note:**

> talk to me about this ship on my [twitter](http://twitter.com/sparrowooj) please


End file.
